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Tales My Mother Told Me… Tale 5: "Finding the inner calm within you…"


Welcome to Tales My Mother Told Me…

Tale 5. “Finding the inner calm within you…”


This week I would like to talk about the importance in finding your inner calm and how it can change you as a person and how it can help your art and design business too.


This tale is taking you back with me to my parents’ very first factory when I was 6 years old. The funniest thing was I can only recall the part that I woke up from a deep sleep resting on the floor and my mum was beside me. It was dark in the evening and the factory did not have any power at the time. Mum had a kerosene lamp sitting on the floor installed into a power board connector. This was our new business, a wholesaling electrical hardware business. I was scared because it was dark and a new place that I was not familiar with. I started to cry and asked mum where everyone was and where was my dad and my brothers and sisters. 


Mum said “Don’t cry my little one, your dad is picking up your brothers & sisters and he’ll be back real soon. Have some cookies you must be hungry now”. 


I was still crying and telling mum I was afraid of the dark and why did the strange men keep staring at us through our front door. Are they going to attack us? Where was my dad? Being a child you just speak your mind! 


Mum said to me “Don’t worry, your father will be soon. Don’t cry.


“Ask them to go away mum” I said.


To stop my crying, mum decided to walk up to the men and spoke to them in a very calm manner.


Mum calmly introduced herself and told them we’d just moved here and this place will be our new home. She then went on to explain that we would be having an opening day the following week and invited them along as well as the senior members of the town. She also mentioned that my dad would be back soon and would love to meet them and get to know the locals.


Now looking back, my mum was quite amazing. She is a little lady with an incredible strong and inner calm about her. On one hand she had her child crying, and on the other hand she had to face complete strangers.  I remember asking her how she dealt with the situation and what was running through her mind. Was she scared? Was she intimidated?


This is what she said ‘Of course I was scared. You were so young and were so scared and I had to be strong for the both of us. I did not want to face those men at all and wished your father was there to deal with the situation but I had to do this to keep you calm and I could not show any sign of fear to those men. I needed to let them know that I was the lady of the house.


“How did you remain so calm mum?” I asked.


To able to do this you need to find your inner calm. If your mind is calm you will remain focused and you are also able to think clearly and find a better way to deal with any situation. Your inner calm or inner peace is very important for your well being, even in a very difficult situation where you are under pressure. If you have established your inner calm, you will be able to handle all situations confidently and competently.


So from this learning, I would like to show you how your inner calm can be beneficial in applying to your business lifestyle.


As we are now living in a hectic world where at times are full of anger, anxiety and depression, we’re also adding our own emotions, stresses and egos into our daily life. By learning to quieten your mind and to release your stresses, take a deep breath and exhale slowly, this will allow you to clear and quieten your mind. You’ll be able to gain clarity and see things from all points of view. On a global level, when you find inner calm, road blocks between people are dissolved and your world or your surroundings no longer seems so hostile. This is because your perception now has greater insights and opportunities.


So to achieve your inner calm here are some of the tips you can apply to your business lifestyle:


1. Keep it simple-Simplicity is the first step to inner calm.

§  Write a simple to-do list. At least 3 or 5 of the most important things you want to achieve today.

§  Understand the difference between the important & the urgent.

§  Build a system for your business Systems help you organise your business and makes everything run effectively. Saves time and reduces stress. 

§  Set daily limits such as checking your email only twice a day, once in the morning and once in the afternoon. Set a time frame such as 20 minutes max each time you check your email, as this will reduce any distractions. Also set time frames on your social media networks like Facebook or twitter. If you do set time limits then you won’t wast hours and wonder where all the time went.


2. Accepting yourself & others. If you are accepting of yourself, people and/or situations as they are, then it brings you an inner calm and tranquillity rather than one of anger and resentment. For your business, accepting doesn’t mean you are throwing down the white towel and calling it quits. It actually means that you put yourself in a better place to take all necessary actions and if you accept what you have done whether right or wrong you will be able to accept and find the solution to improve and grow your business.


3. Forgiveness-is letting go. Forgiving frees not only others but yourself too. What has happened in the past is history and lets you move on. Do not delve into the past, let bygones be bygones.


4. Express gratitude- always remember to appreciate what we have around us, even expressing thanks to someone, will give you a sense of satisfaction and happiness. This in turn will give you inner peace.


5. Being Compassionate-By understanding yourself as a person will open up your compassion for others.


6. Know your DPP(Desire,Passion,Purpose). Do what you love with desire, passion and purpose. If you’re happy in what you’re doing, then there is real purpose for you to keep going and you’ll like and accept yourself too. This will bring you inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you’ll have more success than you could possibly have imagined.


When you do what you love there is already a natural calm that arises within you. Once your inner world and your outer worlds are aligned, then you are too. You will feel a sense of calm and fulfilment.


7. Acknowledge your inner calm. By keeping yourself cool and in a calm spirit you can accomplish anything you want, even if your whole world seems to have gone upside down and things may not be going your way, your inner calm will be very useful in assisting you in making good decisions and getting things done, just like my mum had to face those strangers.


Even though we live in a complex world, time poor and living in more stressful times than ever, you can still practice inner calm by learning meditation techniques. This will calm your mind, increase your happiness and improve relationships with others.



Tune in for next week Tale 6 “The Magic Pen”


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About The Author

I am a Business LifeStyle coach who specialises in working with artists, designers, crafters and all creative professionals. Myself and my partner Stuart Horrex are here to help you to achieve your Life & business goal and dreams. We have had over 20 years experience in finance, retail,furniture,food,wine fashion,crafts and hospitality.

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